“You’re going back for seconds?” “Are you snacking?” “You’re not hungry, you’re just bored.”
These are some of the phrases that some children on TikTok recall their parents telling them from an early age — igniting a viral conversation about “almond moms.”
The phrase “almond mom” was born after a scene from the TV show “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” went viral, according to a statement about “almond moms” by OSF Healthcare in November 2022. The mother in the video, Yolanda Hadid, urges her daughter to eat a few almonds to stave off hunger.
It’s not just a one-clip mother-daughter moment on a reality TV show, though. Now dozens of TikTok creators are sharing stories about their own “almond moms” and how their parent’s diet culture led to negative relationships with food later in life and even eating disorders.
While the phrase “almond moms” targets women, the restrictive diet mentality can be found in dads, too.
“Parents are the biggest role model and influence on eating practices and body image,” Dr. Karla Lester, a pediatrician and life coach for teens and parents, told Buzzfeed News. “If parents have a diet culture thinking about food and body image, there is a lot of judgment and [it] brings restrictive eating practices into the family.”
Some TikTokers have made it their mission to spread awareness about the negative effects of “almond parents,” including Tyler Bender, who shares stories of visiting friends’ houses, where she can eat pizza, drink Gatorade and munch on Halloween candy.
Her video got 8 million views, and hundreds of viewers shared their own childhood experiences.
“When I had whole milk for the first time, I thought it was a milkshake,” one person said.
“My mom told me I’m allergic to pepperoni and sausage,” another said.
“When patterns are developed at a young age — sometimes even as early as 5, 6 or 7 years old — and we emphasize and focus on negative aspects of food, that can create a pattern that follows children. So when you are talking about foods with kids, you want to emphasize healthy choices,” Abby Vladika, a family medicine advanced practice nurse, told OSF Healthcare in an interview.
Lester, a teen metabolic health doctor known as Dr. Karla on TikTok, urges mothers experiencing “almond” tendencies to reach out for help to avoid causing harm to themselves or their children.
“I’ve been seeing a lot of my coaching practice … moms coming to me, some saying, ‘I’m so worried I’m an almond mom, I watched your video and I cried,’” she said in a TikTok. “So I want to say you are not stuck and your child is not stuck and there is a better way.”
One mom responded to a video that went viral of Tyler Bender impersonating an almond mom to bring up an overlooked point – it’s not always “almond moms’” fault that they are like this, @InappropriateMommie said.
There’s a reason that “almond moms” always say that dessert is too sweet, or they split a one-serving dish, or only dip the tip of their fork in the dressing, the TikTok mom said.
“They were raised and they were steeped in a culture that stated to them that the only thing that was valuable about them was their attractiveness and 100% of their attractiveness was based on how thin they were,” @InappropriateMommie said. “We can’t hate on the Almond Moms. They’re starving …they’ve been hungry for 50 years and they’re not allowed to eat because they’ll lose all of their self-worth.”
According to 2021 statistics from the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders:
42% of first- to third-grade girls want to be thinner.
81% of 10-year-old children are afraid of being fat.
46% of 9-11 year-olds are “sometimes” or “very often” on diets.
35-57% of adolescent girls engage in crash dieting, fasting, self-induced vomiting, diet pills or laxatives.
In a college campus survey, 91% of the women admitted to controlling their weight through dieting.
“I’m a big advocate of healthy eating with balance, moderation, and really avoiding using the word ‘diet’ because diets tend to be trendy and not sustainable long-term,” Vladika told OSF Healthcare. “So overall, with kids, really set the foundation of healthy eating habits and how to incorporate those and discuss why certain foods are good foods versus mentioning ‘bad’ foods.”
Eating disorders can range from anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, binge-eating disorder, and avoidant restrictive food intake disorder, according to the National Institute of Mental Health. Visit the institutes’ resource page for support and to find treatment.
Teens flooded gymnastics meet to see TikTok star Olivia Dunne. ‘Scary and disturbing’
Nurses out of a job after TikTok shows them mock moms in labor, Georgia hospital says
TikTok and Meta platforms harm kids’ mental health, WA school district says in lawsuit
Bar puts sign up saying victims of domestic abuse aren’t welcome, Illinois photo shows
